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Woke up last night at 4:30 from a bad dream. It was unpleasant, but I usually get up at 5:30 anyway, so I just stayed awake and played video games.
This was actually kind of nice because I managed to drag myself outside at 6am to go for a walk, playing through the first mission of Zombies, Run!. It was pretty damn pleasant, considering how hot it got up to during the day, so I think I'm going to start the Zombies, Run! 5k edition tomorrow. Working out at home has gotten a little stale, and it's nice to have both variety and a specific goal to work towards.
(My strength training goal is 'be able to do a full push up'. Little to no success on this yet.)
I was looking into local 5ks, and I think I found one that might work as a fun target, though it lands around week 7, so I'm not sure if I want to sign up in the 'Walking' or 'Running' category. Decisions are hard. Ask me again in a week.
Speaking of cardio, I also looked up local Parkour classes, and there's one that miiiight work on Fridays. I'll check it out this Friday and see how I feel about it, though it might make me too sore to go to yoga on Saturdays. I'm in TRY ALL THE THINGS mode right now.
One of the reasons why I'm doing so much and thinking so much about it is because I'm doing better at -- either through yoga or meditation or both -- of feeling connected to my body and feeling pleasure in making it do things. It hurts, and it sucks, and I'm awful at pretty much everything right now (and I am discovering the pleasant shade of beet-red my face turns whenever I get my heart rate up), but it's kind of awesome, too? My body does things? I can make it do things?
I read an essay today by the head writer of Zombies, Run!, Naomi Alderman, that really captured that feeling of it: There’s No Morality in Exercise: I’m a Fat Person and Made a Successful Fitness App. There's a lot here that's good, but I'm going to spoil some of it by posting the part that really spoke to me:
This was actually kind of nice because I managed to drag myself outside at 6am to go for a walk, playing through the first mission of Zombies, Run!. It was pretty damn pleasant, considering how hot it got up to during the day, so I think I'm going to start the Zombies, Run! 5k edition tomorrow. Working out at home has gotten a little stale, and it's nice to have both variety and a specific goal to work towards.
(My strength training goal is 'be able to do a full push up'. Little to no success on this yet.)
I was looking into local 5ks, and I think I found one that might work as a fun target, though it lands around week 7, so I'm not sure if I want to sign up in the 'Walking' or 'Running' category. Decisions are hard. Ask me again in a week.
Speaking of cardio, I also looked up local Parkour classes, and there's one that miiiight work on Fridays. I'll check it out this Friday and see how I feel about it, though it might make me too sore to go to yoga on Saturdays. I'm in TRY ALL THE THINGS mode right now.
One of the reasons why I'm doing so much and thinking so much about it is because I'm doing better at -- either through yoga or meditation or both -- of feeling connected to my body and feeling pleasure in making it do things. It hurts, and it sucks, and I'm awful at pretty much everything right now (and I am discovering the pleasant shade of beet-red my face turns whenever I get my heart rate up), but it's kind of awesome, too? My body does things? I can make it do things?
I read an essay today by the head writer of Zombies, Run!, Naomi Alderman, that really captured that feeling of it: There’s No Morality in Exercise: I’m a Fat Person and Made a Successful Fitness App. There's a lot here that's good, but I'm going to spoil some of it by posting the part that really spoke to me:
No, what happened was better: I started to enjoy being in my body. I felt better. I felt good. It is a very different feeling to be in a fat body that is moving a lot to one that hardly moves at all. It feels like love. As simple and as joyful as that.