Okay, I really thought my crafting hyperfixation of the month was going to be beading on a loom. Earlier this year, I picked up a book about it, thanks to a need to spend over $10 at a thrift store, and then a few weeks ago, I saw a plastic bead loom at Michael's and nabbed it. Obviously from there, I realized the kit was not sufficient for My Vision, so I headed back to Michael's and dropped a truly silly amount on beads and weird needles. Have I started beading, which I'm excited to do? No, obviously first I have to clean off my crafting table, which involves SO much organizing, purging and Gingko-wrangling, so she doesn't eat or destroy any of the above.

Then, over Thanksgiving, YouTube slammed me with an unexpected interest. yooon_ie lives in Chicago, apparently close enough to the West Loop Goodwill that she can stop by often enough to pounce when she finds a vintage Coach bag in the wild. Her parents are a cobbler and a tailor, according to her telling, and she's got all kinds of amazing skills and know-how for taking these designer objects in tragic condition and rehabilitating them in a flash.

I am fascinated. It's related to the emotional satisfaction one gets watching a pet groomer rescue a terribly matted stray from neglect, though with less body horror. There are so many videos out there; I definitely spent more than one evening just working my way through everyone's shorts, which all follow the same pattern with the same ASMR. And so, the urge rises: I want to experience this! I want to find a mistreated designer bag for $8.99 in a back rack at Goodwill and treat myself to Real Luxury Like They Used to Make! I've never been a bag girlie or even a girly girlie. This, like my sudden realization that makeup is fun, actually, is all very new on my end.

Here is the problem: Because it is maximum load USPS season, everything I'm splurging on is very slow to come in the mail. I can spend the money and absolutely nothing about it is real because it is taking two weeks to get here. I became briefly insane last Sunday and decided it was worth it to buy a new bag from Coach Factory, and the delivery date keeps dropping back, and like!! Then I remembered DePop was a thing and immediately stayed up until 2 AM this Saturday bookmarking candidates (because I spent the weekend exploring varying thrift stores and coming to understand that thrifting is a persistence predator's game). Yesterday I tried out the "make an offer" button and then the seller accepted basically immediately?? So I DO have a glorious vintage '90s minimalist Coach purse (Swinger in black!) coming my way, for too much money STILL because of fees, but Amazon has not come through on my freaking saddle soap/horsehair brush/Leather CPR order, so obviously nothing exists until I can see it and hold it in my hands!!! And even then!!!!!

I am but a humble public media journalist, my poor bank account cannot take this ADHD object-permanence nonsense. All of this absolutely did start because my therapist poked me in the forehead and reminded me that it is good, in fact, to treat yourself and that it is hard to do things like date (more on that another time!) when you feel like a feral gremlin all the time. (That said, I do have a story in mind about this bag rehabber community that I hope to publish for Mother's Day, so maybe I can write it off for my taxes at some point.)

All of this does fall a bit into perspective given the real ballgame I'm warming up for: This morning, I spent an hour with a realtor who's going to help me, fingers crossed, Buy a Condo in the next few months. Speaking of money that absolutely isn't and cannot be real to me. But she's got sassy realtor energy and I am really excited to get started For Real on this search. ✶